In the same way that it is easy for someone not to embrace each day of the week because of being completely absorbed in what will happen over the weekend, it is just as easy for them to ignore the people in their life because they are completely absorbed. . on your smartphone. In each of these cases, the present moment will not be fully accepted.

A smart phone could be seen as the ideal piece of technology for the mind, since it gives the mind a way out of the present moment. The mind needs something to do and has nothing to do in the now.

The problem

But, although someone’s mind will be happy to be totally absorbed in this technology, it does not mean that the people with whom they spend their time are equally happy with this. On the other hand, if these people are also attached to your device, it may not bother them that much.

Most of your time will be spent elsewhere, even though your physical body will be right in front of them. There is a term that comes to mind here, and this is “just together”, in which two people are together, but still alone.

In the same boat

When two people behave this way, there may be times when they get angry because the other person is not present, but this could happen soon. In a short time, what is happening on a screen will be much more important.

The person who is right in front of them will be more like a distraction than someone who is an important part of their life. Therefore, as long as the other does not want too much attention, everything should be fine.

To be seen

When someone spends a lot of time on a smartphone when he is close to others, it can also be a way of hiding. And if they do not feel comfortable with being seen, they will feel comfortable with people who behave in the same way.

The other person will be too busy looking at a screen to really see it, and this could prevent them from feeling discordant. Deep down they will want to be seen, but the luggage that is inside them will have caused them to have the opposite need.


Ultimately, they are an interdependent human being, and that is why they need human contact. Therefore, when this does not happen, it will have a negative effect on your well-being.

However, when someone is very embarrassed, for example, and does not want to be around people who actually show up, this will prevent them from meeting this need. The need to hide will be stronger than the need to be seen.

Set aside

If someone consumes your device and the person you are with does not spend so much time on it, it is likely to have a negative effect on them as time passes. At first, this could be something they could ignore and simply tolerate.

They might end up asking them not to use their smartphone so much, hoping that they will see how destructive it is for them to behave this way. However, they may not get the message and continue to behave this way.

Only one direction

If these two people are in an intimate relationship, the emotional connection they have can begin to disappear. The person who spends a lot of time on their device has already been directing a lot of their energy to their phone (this could even be their main relationship), and now the other person will start to regain their energy.

From the outside, it might seem that their relationship has not changed, and this could be because they still live together. This will be no more than an illusion, since the bond that existed between them will have weakened.

Another example

A friendship between two people may end up going the same way, too. Here, it is possible that someone does not spend much time with each other’s company, but it is unlikely that the time they spend with them will be very rewarding.

Then, unlike the person who is in a relationship with someone like this, they will not spend so much time in presence. Or, as this person will rarely be present, it would be more accurate to say that they will not see them that much.

The consequences

But regardless of the context, there are certain things that can happen when someone can not leave their device and be present. The person they are with may end up feeling ignored, disrespectful and as if they did not value them.

These emotions are going to be like the kryptonite to the emotional connection they have. What this emphasizes is that it is not enough that someone is in the company of another person; Your whole presence needs to be there.

A result

This is similar to how it is not enough for a father to be very close to his son so that his son feels seen: he must be completely present with him. A child can be neglected without being physically abandoned; This can take place by having a physically present but emotionally unavailable father.


Talking about what is happening could be the best approach to follow; but it may be easier for someone to look to another person to meet their needs if they are in a relationship. Taking the second option may end up creating another problem, without solving the first.

If someone realizes that they spend too much time on their device when they are around other people, they can start to keep their phone close to others; this will make it easier for them to actually appear. This is something that probably has a positive effect on all your relationships.